Keto Paleo Veggie Roast

I don’t go in for all these pre-amble things where recipe authors need to tell you their life story.  This recipe is awesome next to any slice of meat you care to add to it.

  • 1 pack Frozen Broccoli Crowns
  • 1 pack Frozen Cauliflower Crowns
  • 1 small pack of Radishes, cut in half
  • 1 large Red Onion, chopped large
  • 1 Large Red Pepper, chopped large
  • 1 Large Green Onion, chopped large
  • 1 large Eggplant, chopped large, skin removed
  • 1 medium Zucchini, sliced in larger chunks
  • 2 tablespoons Olive Oil
  • 1/2 stick softened butter
  • 8 cloves of garlic, minced with salt
  • 1/2 cup chopped fresh Parsley
  • Salt and pepper
  1. Preheat oven to 420 degrees
  2. Throw everything but the butter, garlic and parsley in a large mixing bowl.  
  3. Add 1 teaspoon of salt, 1/2 teaspoon of pepper
  4. Stir coat all the veggies in the oil.
  5. Layout on a sheet pan in a single layer and put into the oven for 15-20 minutes.  
  6. While they are roasting, mix the garlic, softened butter and parsley together in the large bowl you used for the veggies.
  7. When they come out of the oven, dump them into the bowl with the butter and stir until the garlic is fragrant and butter is melted.  Serve!

Garlic Yogurt Sauce

  • 4 Cloves Garlic, crushed into paste
  • 2 cups Greek Yogurt, plain
  • 1/2 Fresh Parsley, chopped
  • 1 teaspoon Dill, dry
  • 1 cup Mayonnaise
  • Juice of 1 Lime
  • 1 teaspoon Salt
  • 1/2 cup Buttermilk
  • 4 stalks Green Onion, minced with salt

NOTE:  Chopping the parsley and the garlic together with the salt, then using the flat of a knife blade to continue spreading it across a cutting board is a great way to get the paste required.

  1. Add everything to a bowl and whisk together.
  2. Refrigerate for 30 minutes or longer to allow the flavors to mingle.  Awesome on salads, rice dishes, and even over nachos!

Peri-Peri Chicken and Rice

  • 2lbs Boneless Skinless Chicken Thighs
  • 1/2 Teaspoon Peri-Peri Powder
  • 1 can Petite Chopped Tomatoes
  • 2 Red Bell Peppers, chopped
  • 1 Jalapeno, sliced WITH SEEDS
  • 2 Green Peppers
  • 6 cloves Garlic
  • 1/4 cup Brown Sugar
  • 1/2 cup Raw Honey
  • 1 Hot Kielbasa Link, sliced
  • 5 shots Hot Sauce
  • 2 Bay Leaves
  • 3 tablespoons Apple Cider Vinegar
  • 2 cups Strong Black Coffee
  • 2 tablespoons Soy Sauce
  • 2 tablespoons Butter
  • 3 cups Medium to Long Grain Rice, uncooked
  1. Layout chicken thighs and season with salt and pepper.  Add the Hot Kielbasa.  Bake at 400F for 18 minutes.  Remove from oven and reserve rendered fat.
  2. Add butter to large sauce pan.  Add all chopped peppers and Jalapeno.  Saute until soft.  
  3. Add tomatoes, hot sauce, garlic, Peri-peri, soy sauce, vinegar, coffee, brown sugar and bay leaves to the sauce pan.  Bring to a boil and lower heat to simmer for 30 minutes.  While it simmers, cut up the chicken into bite-sized chunks.
  4. Using a rice cooker, wash your rice 3 times.  Then add the render chicken fat to the rice.  Stir it up and then add 3 cups of water.  Set to cook.  (You can also do this on the stovetop in a covered pot.)
  5. Once rice is done, mix the chicken, kielbasa, rice, honey, and the sauce into a very large mixing bowl or pot.  Stir it all together and then test for seasoning.  Add salt as needed.
  6. Serve with Garlic Yogurt Sauce drizzled on top as a condiment.

 

 

 

Rice Cooker Sweet Beans

A really great way to make a mess of beans for super cheap!   2lb bag of Pinto Beans is $1.48.  That makes this entire bunch of beans total around $4.20.
This makes 13 half-cup servings, at 32 cents each and 200 Calories.

  • 2 lb dried Pinto Beans
  • 1 large onion, chopped
  • 3 tablespoons Butter
  • Salt
  • Pepper
  • 6 cloves garlic, minced
  • 3 tablespoons Brown Mustard
  • ½ cup Brown Sugar
  • 1 can Tomato Paste
  • 3 shakes Hot Sauce
  • ½ teaspoon Cumin
  • 2 tablespoons smooth Peanut Butter
  • 4 tablespoons Soy Sauce
  • 1 teaspoon Liquid Smoke
  1. Sort beans and wash them.
  2. Put them in Rice Cooker on Brown Rice setting covered in 3 inches of water.
  3. Once the cycle finishes, drain and refill water to 2 inches over beans.
  4. Cook on a 2nd cycle of Brown Rice.
  5. Cook onions on medium in 4 tablespoons of butter until slightly caramelized.
  6. Add minced garlic and cook until fragrant, turn off heat after that.
  7. When second cycle completes on rice cooker, add everything (including cooked onions) into the pot and stir together.
  8. Test beans for being done, run everything in one more cycle of Brown Rice if not tender to your liking.
  9. Allow flavors to mingle for at least 30 minutes before serving.
  10. Salt and Pepper to taste

Maduros Lasagna (Sweet Sausage and Plantain Lasagna)

  • 6 Very Ripe Plantains (50% blackened)
  • 1 lb Sweet Italian Sausage (can use just ground pork)
  • 2 medium Yellow onions, chopped
  • 8oz Cream Cheese
  • ½ cup Parmesan, shredded
  • 1 tablespoon Garlic Powder
  • 1 tablespoon Oregano
  • 1 tablespoon Basil
  • 4 tablespoons Butter
  • 1 cup Milk
  • 1 pack Chicken Boullion
  • 2 teaspoons Soy Sauce
  • 2 teaspoons Worcestershire Sauce
  • ¾ cup Chopped Scallions (green and white parts)
  • Olive oil
  • 4 tablespoons Flour
  • 1 lb Fresh Mozzarella, sliced medium thick (need about 18 slices)

 

  1. Cook onions on medium in 2 tbsp of butter until just beginning to carmelize.
  2. Add Sausage (or pork) crumbled and break it up as it cooks.  Cook until sausage is slightly browned then remove from heat.
  3. Soften the cream cheese the microwave (or however you want).
  4. In a bowl, mix cream cheese, parmesan, garlic powder, Oregano, Basil, chicken bouillon, soy sauce, Worcestershire sauce.  Combine until smooth, might need to warm it in the microwave to get everything smooth.
  5. In the pan with the sausage and onion, bring it back to medium heat.  Add the remaining butter. Once it melts, sprinkle in the flour and keep stirring.
  6. Once the sausage mixture stiffens, slowly add the cream cheese sauce until it is all added.  It will thicken quickly, remove from heat.
  7. Use some olive oil to grease the bottom and sides of a 9×13 cake pan or casserole dish.
  8. Peel and slice the plantains into long slices (which is a little tricky, do your best!)
  9. Lay down a single layer of slices in the oiled cake pan.
  10. Spoon about 1/2 of the sausage and sauce mixture over this.
  11. Lay 9 slices of mozzarella evenly over the mixture.
  12. Add another layer of plantain, then meat sauce, then cheese.
  13. Bake this in a 375F (190C) degree oven for 45 minutes (uncovered).
  14. Remove from oven and there should be a bubbling layer of oil on top.  Scatter the green onions over this hot oil evenly. You will smell a super oniony smell.  

Allow the Lasagna to cool for about 30 minutes before serving.  It’s better the next when the flavors have fully mingled.

Rebel Arroz con Pollo with Lime-pickled onions

Lime Pickled Onions

  • 2 large Red Onions, sliced thinly
  • 2 tablespoons of Salt
  • 6 Limes, Juiced
  • 4 tablespoons strong Olive Oil
  • 1 large Tomato, chopped

1. Salt the onions and tomato in a container.
2. Add the lime juice and olive oil.
3. Mix thoroughly and refrigerate for 8 hours, mixing now and then.
4. Will last until the end of time and get better every day.
5. They are good on everything.

Rebel Arroz con Pollo
(This makes a LOT)

  • 4 cups Basmati Rice
  • 1.5 cups strong Chicken Broth
  • 8-10 oz Andouille or Chorico sausage, Chopped
  • 1 tablespoon Cumin
  • 1 large Yellow Onion
  • 1 Red Pepper, chopped
  • 1 Green Pepper, chopped
  • 1 Jalapeno, chopped (and seeded if you don’t want it too spicy)
  • 1 cup chopped Fresh parsley
  • 8 cloves Garlic (minced fine)
  • 2 large Bay Leaves
  • 1 8oz can chopped Tomato
  • ½ cup Achiote Oil (or 4 tablespoons Annatto Powder + ½ cup strong Olive Oil)
  • 2 tablespoons Worcestershire Sauce
  • 4 tablespoons Apple Cider Vinegar
  • 1 cup Green onions chopped
  • 3lbs Boneless Chicken thighs
  • 1 teaspoon Liquid Smoke

1. Salt and pepper the chicken thighs and bake at 400 degrees for 15 minutes. Allow to cool.
2. Put the achiote oil in a LARGE skillet (or sauce pan) and get it hot. Drop in the Chorico sausage and cook for 3 minutes on medium.
3. Add into the skillet the onion, red pepper, green pepper, jalapeno (seeded or not). Cook until onion is tender.
4. Add in the garlic, turn heat to low. Cook for 2 minutes and drop in the tomatoes.
5. Simmer for 10 minutes on low, stirring.
6. Add the Chicken stock, turn up heat and simmer for 5 minutes.
7. Wash the rice 3 times (ALWAYS WASH IT 3 TIMES!!!)
8. Mix the uncooked rice, the sauce, liquid smoke, cumin, 2 bay leaves and vinegar THEN either cook on the stove in a pot (EXPERT LEVEL) or in a rice cooker (Rice cookers rock).
9. Chop the chicken into 1 inch pieces.
10. Fluff rice when done and put into a large mixing bowl. Add the parsley and green onion while still hot. Remove the bay leaves.
11. Serve with Lime Pickled Onions and Avocado!

Ropas Viejas – Shredded Marinated Beef

  • 2lbs Cheap beef roast like Eye of Round or something. The more gristly it is, the better it will taste when done.
  • 2 Large onions, sliced.
  • 2 large peppers (Green,Red) Sliced. (Optional)
  • 4 cloves garlic, mashed with salt
  • 3 tablespoons Annato Seed, crushed (You can get the powder here)
  • 1/4 cup Olive Oil
  • 1/4 cup Apple Cider Vinegar
  • Juice of 2 limes
  • 1 tsp Chili Powder
  • 1 tablespoon Cumin
  • 1/2 teaspoon Black Pepper
  • 1 teaspoon salt

1. Cut the roast into thick slices. About 1/2-3/4 inch thick.

2. In a large bowl whisk together Annato powder, garlic, oil, vinegar, lime juice, chili powder, cumin, pepper and salt. This is the marinade.

3. Put the beef into the marinade and coat it well, push it down so it is mostly covered by marinade. Allow to marinade for at LEAST 2 hours but not longer than 12.

4. In a covered roasting dish, lay the sliced onions then the sliced peppers in the bottom. Place the marinated beef on top. Pour marinade over this. Cover and bake for 1.5-2 hours at 375 until meat pulls apart very easily.

5. Use 2 forks to shred the meat easily. Stir it around so onions and peppers are distributed throughout. Serve cauliflower rice or puree. Leftovers taste better the next day as the flavors mingle.

 

Pork Fried Cauliflower Rice

  • 1 cup Shredded Cabbage
  • 4 cups Riced Cauliflower
  • 1 cup sliced Mushrooms
  • 4 tablespoons Soy Sauce
  • 2 tablespoons Sesame Oil (hot is good!)
  • 6 Eggs, whisked
  • 1lb Pork, cubed small
  • 2 tablespoons Rice Wine Vinegar
  • 1 cup Chopped Scallions
  • 1 tablespoon Ghee (or butter)
  • Salt and Pepper to taste
  1. In a pan over medium heat, add the ghee or butter and melt it.
  2. Add the pork and cook it quickly, about  2 minutes.
  3. Then add the shredded cabbage and mushrooms and cook until wilted.
  4. Add the riced cauliflower, soy sauce and semsame oil.  Stir around to coat well and cook for 2 minutes then move to one side of the pan.
  5. Pour eggs into cleared side of pan and stir them until they develop into firm scrambled eggs.  Mix it with the cauliflower and pork.  Test the cauliflower for doneness (rice-like firmness but not raw).
  6. Remove from heat and mix in chopped scallions and allow the heat of the food to bring out their flavor.  Salt and pepper to taste!

Curry Peanut Chicken

  • 2 lbs of chicken breast, cubed
  • 3 tablespoons Cumin
  • 3 tablespoons Curry Powder
  • 1/4 cup of 100% Peanuts peanut butter
  • Zest of 1 lime
  • 1/2 cup Greek Yogurt (full fat)
  • 1 Jalapeno, chopped with seeds
  • 1 tablespoon Onion pwder
  • 1 tablespoon Garlic powder
  • 1/2 cup chopped fresh Cilantro
  • 2 tablespoon Ghee (or just butter)
  • Salt to taste

Makes 6 servings at 332 calories per serving and 8 carbs

We usually serve this over riced cauliflower.  if you don’t feel like making your own, you can buy them already riced now!  Check it out!

  1.  In a large bowl, mix together salt, cumin, curry powder, lime zest, greek yogurt, onion powder, garlic powder.  Once it is well mixed, add the cubed raw chicken and put it in the fridge to marinate for at least an hour…. but overnight is the best.
  2.  In a sauce pan on medium heat, add the ghee (or butter).  As soon as it melts throw in the jalapeno and move it around a for about a minute.
  3. Now drop in the chicken mixture.  Saute the chicken until it begins to get firmer, about 7-9 minutes.
  4. Now add the peanut butter.  You can microwave some in a bowl for a few seconds to get it easier to pour into the chicken.  Stir it in and it will thicken the sauce.
  5. After another 5 minutes of cooking, turn off the heat move the pan off the burner.
  6. Drop the chopped Cilantro on top and allow the heat of the food to wilt it.
  7. Let the curry chicken cool a bit and the fats will thicken the sauce even more.
  8. Serve over the riced cauliflower or even zucchini noodles!  It’s also better the next day after it has set in the fridge for a day.  You can also garnish the top with some green onions and a few peanuts!

EAT FROM THE GARDEN: Swiss Chard

This is a first in my series of eating from my small garden.  I have a few raised beds and practice an intense method of planting.  Just a little bit of room produces lots of food.

Some of my garden is not low-carb or Keto-friendly.  I am experimenting with container potatoes and a couple of heirloom corn stalks.  But most everything else is going to be useful to Keto people.

One thing that always grows amazing in my garden is Swiss Chard.  Swiss Chard has big (sometimes massive) leaves that are reminiscent of spinach but tougher in consistency.  The central vein of each big leaf is fibrous and sometimes cut out and thrown away.  I like to chop them fine and cook them with the leaves.

The simplest method of cooking is to chop and sautee them with a little fat (butter or bacon or beef lard) and season with salt, pepper, and some garlic.

I add it to everything, almost like a condiment.